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September 23, 2008 / yolynne

Selfishness Can Also Be Healthy

This is an excerpt from the artice of Jane S. Gonzales in the August issue of Kerygma magazine.  I had always been a people pleaser, and thought of others’ welfare first before my own.  I just realized that this is not a healthy attitude to keep.  I tend to be depressed or be sad during times that I feel rejected.  It is something that I am battling with right now.  I am slowly improving and thinking more for myself first before others, because I realized that I cannot really be of assistance to others if I cannot even fend for myself.

Selfishness Can Also Be Healthy

Healthy selfishness means knowing our limits and setting them,  It is a healthy way of acknowledging entitlement that leads to a life of freedom from being ruled by the opinions and demands of other people and of circumstances.  It includes the capacity to nurture ourselves, to take rest when needed, to ask for what we need and seek emotional support so that we can avoid burnout and keep on giving.

Many of us find it difficult to practice healthy selfishness and consequently fail to realize that it can actually define and lead us to the path where it would be much easier for blessings to come into our lives and allow us to use our full potentials.  We spend so much time take care of others, doing things we feel we should be doing and fulfilling obligations we impose on ourselves.

Self-care often takes the backseat.  Ignoring our own needs for a long time robs us of energy and makes us feel exhausted, dissatisfied and resentful.  Thus we need to recharge and refill our personal tank.  We do this by doing things we love to do, discovering our own potentials, acknowledging our possibilities and accomplishing things that would make us feel good about ourselves and ultimately, bring out the best in us.  And while we are in the process of accomplishing things for ourselves, we must learn to let go of unnecessary guilt because it would only pull us down even more.

It may be hard to believe but we can be happier persons and find purpose and meaning in things we do if we concentrate on ourselves first and practice healthy selfishness.  When we make the choice to nourish ourselves, we become more generous with our time, energy and resources.  We tend to offer ourselves in the service of those we love and therefore live a more meaningful life.

Thanks Ms. Jane Gonzales and Kerygma Family for producing quality feel good articles every month.

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